Monday, March 07, 2011

The Meaning of VAL-


- How can we obtain and sustain meaningful, long-lasting relationships without access to other-validation?


Word Unit: val- valid-, vale-, -vail, -valent, -valence


Latin Meaningvalere, to be strong, to be well, to be worth; strong; power, strength; and "fare well" [go with strength]


Words (Common): valid, validate, valor, availabie, evaluate. equivalence, prevail, prevalent, convalescent, ambivalent, valentine, valient, invaluable/value/devalue/overvalue/undervalue.  Valentine?







- When we are validated, others express our value to them. Conversely, when we validate others, we express our value in them.


- When we self-validate ("I am good at x." or "I can y." or "I place a z quality or value or positive judgement on myself."), we are both strengthening ourselves and reclaiming our own sense of worth -- but only in our own minds in order to regulate negative emotions. Our own minds are a separation from the rest of the world's experience of us. Self-validation is a self-preservation/self-defense mechanism and not always aligned with other's perceptions of us -- whether their perceptions are accurate or not.


Recent Expressions Delivered to Me:

Volo, non valeo. -- I am willing but unable.

Vale. -- Goodbye.

Aeternum vale. -- Farewell forever.

Vive valeque, -- Live and be well.


Ambivalence, Ambivalency

1. Behavior resulting from two incompatible motivations, often taking the form of a mixture of the two motivational tendencies.

2. The presence of two opposing ideas, attitudes, or emotions at the same time.

3. A feeling of uncertainty about something due to a mental conflict.




Human Values (what humans value), according to one man that appeal to me:


The Value of Love, Respect, Trust, Communication of one man that appeal to me:


Christy's Prompt / My Challenge:

Southwest Airlines has three values:

A Warrior Spirit

A Servant’s Heart

A Fun-LUVing Attitude



The Values I Posted to Christy's Prompt

Personally: True Love, Meaningful Work, Life-long Learning/Adventurous Spirit.

Business (Meaningful Work): Conscientious Decision-Making (People, Planet/Profit), Equal Energy Exchange, Caring & Creative Atmosphere.


What I want to believe again:

Vita non est vivere sed valere vita est.

Life is not [just] to live, but life is to be strong, vigorous.

Life is more than merely staying alive.


Prompted by conversation with Jo Baer, challenge by Christy Morell-Stinson, meeting with Amy Engenberger, ongoing struggle with the value of DBT and other self-help systems with Leslie Scaramuszzo.

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